Is Malik Monk Actually a Human Being?

After Malik Monk’s 20 point second half against Vanderbilt, we really have to start asking the question.

Malik Monk is many things. Kentucky’s freshman shooting guard is a deadly three point shooter, an explosive athlete, and a lottery pick in the 2017 NBA Draft.

But the more I watch him, I am left wondering one thing. Is he even a human being?

Maybe he’s a monster, or a gifted alien being? Perhaps he is a basketball robot built in a Vine Factory? Put on your tin-foil hats, it’s time for a conspiracy theory.

Here are three suspiciously unbelievable Monk plays.

Is Malik Monk a superhero?

The signs that something was off with this kid were there early in the season. I’d call this a pass to Wenyen Gabriel, but that sounds like a gross understatement.

Are you serious? You can’t be serious.

There is only one explanation. Monk was infected by a chemical spill as a child and given supernatural abilities, which would explain his incredible leaping and stretching. Then, he probably spent the next 15 years or so watching And-1 mixtapes.

Everything about this play screams superhero. Any normal person would let that basketball soar out of bounds. They would have no other choice. But Monk can’t hide his supernatural abilities when a killer play can be made. He snaps into action, and suddenly I’m wondering who will play him in his Marvel movie.

Is Malik Monk a cyborg?

Opponents must occasionally trash talk Monk.

If someone says they can guard him, I imagine this is his response:

“But Malik Monk is always smiling and laughing. How could he be a cyborg?” I’ll tell you how Malik Monk could be a cyborg.

Monk is such a sophisticated mechanism that he intentionally shows emotions that upset people, just so he can show more emotion by apologizing.

It is full-proof. No one is suspicious of Monk’s deadpan killer instinct because it’s in his programming to always look joyful. Technology is scary.

Is Malik Monk an automobile?

Hear me out. Monk may actually be a high powered motor vehicle. Just watch the dunk he nearly threw down against Tennessee last month.

Not buying it? I understand. From that angle, it looks like someone could reasonably destroy another person like that. But take a look at a close-up view of the play.

Monk nearly ran over that Tennessee player, leaving him fearing for his life. You can tell he accepted his fate. He didn’t even try to avoid the collision. Monk had mercy, slammed on the brakes, and saved the poor guy’s life.

Next: Kentucky's Five Keys to Post-Season Success

There’s no telling if Monk is actually a human being or not. Show me the undeniable proof. If I had to bet, he probably isn’t.